Things I Stopped Doing When I Started Protecting My Peace
Protecting my peace has become one of those things I take very seriously now.
Not in a “cut everybody off and disappear” kind of way. And definitely not because I suddenly have life completely figured out. I’ve just gotten to a point where I realize that everything does not deserve access to me.
Every situation DOES NOT need a reaction.
Every relationship DOES NOT need to be saved.
And everything that doesn’t go according to my plan doesn’t mean something is going wrong.
Sometimes protecting your peace is less about what you start doing and more about what you finally stop doing.
And I had to stop doing a lot.
I Stopped Saying Yes Just to Keep Everyone Else Happy
I had to learn that saying no does not make me a bad person.
There were so many times I said yes when I really wanted to say no because I didn’t want someone to be upset with me, disappointed in me, or think differently of me.
Meanwhile, I was the one inconvenienced, overwhelmed, irritated, or exhausted. That makes absolutely no sense when you really think about it lol.
Why am I sacrificing my comfort to make sure everyone else is comfortable??? Now, I try to be more intentional about what I agree to. If I have the capacity, cool. If I genuinely want to do something, even better. But I’m no longer automatically saying yes because I feel guilty saying no.
People pleasing will have you abandoning yourself just to avoid disappointing somebody else.
I’m not doing that anymore.
I Stopped Comparing My Timeline to Everyone Else’s
This one is still a work in progress.
It is soooo easy to compare yourself when we literally have access to everybody’s accomplishments all day long.
Someone got the job.
A creator hit 100K followers.
Someone’s business took off.
Someone’s content is getting thousands of likes.
Someone just announced another opportunity.
And you’re sitting there wondering, Okay God…what about me?
I’ve definitely felt this way with my career. There are specific roles and opportunities I’ve been working toward, and sometimes it feels like it’s taking me much longer to get there while I watch opportunities happen quickly for other people. I’ve felt it with content creation too. You can put time, creativity, and effort into something just to watch another page grow faster or get more engagement.
But I had to remind myself: I don’t know their journey.
I don’t know how many times they heard no, how long they were working before anybody noticed, what they sacrificed, who helped them, what connections they had, or what they went through privately.
So why am I comparing my entire life to the small portion of theirs that I can see?
What is meant for me will happen when it is supposed to happen. I have to trust that God is doing His will in my life, even when His timing doesn’t match the timeline I created in my head.
And whew…that part.
I Stopped Trying to Control Everything
I am learning to let things be.
That sounds simple, but for someone who likes knowing what’s next, it can be HARD.
I used to feel like I needed to figure everything out. If something wasn’t moving, I needed to push it. If something wasn’t happening fast enough, I needed to find another way. If I didn’t know what was coming next, I needed a plan immediately.
But forcing things is exhausting.
There is a difference between putting in effort and constantly trying to make something happen that simply isn’t moving. Sometimes the answer is n or not yet.
Maybe the door closing really is protection and sometimes you have to stop pulling on a door that God clearly isn’t opening.
I still have goals, work hard, make plans, and go after the things I want.
I’m just learning that I don’t have to grip everything so tightly.
Protecting my peace looks different to me now
Protecting my peace hasn’t made my life perfect. I still overthink, get disappointed, and have moments where comparison creeps in or I wonder why something hasn’t happened yet.
The difference is that I don’t live there as long anymore.
I’m learning to release people, situations, expectations, and timelines that constantly leave me feeling drained.
Peace sometimes looks like saying no without writing a paragraph explaining why.
It’s believing patterns instead of potential, celebrating someone else without questioning my own progress, doing my part and trusting God with the rest.
And more than anything, it looks like understanding that I don’t have to force what’s meant for me.
What belongs in my life will meet me there.
And until then, I’m protecting my peace.
